


Two Old Men in Hell

by Holyshitfuck



Category: Devil May Cry
Genre: Gen, One Shot Collection, Semi One-Shots
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-18
Updated: 2019-03-18
Packaged: 2019-11-23 08:45:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,199
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18149657
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Holyshitfuck/pseuds/Holyshitfuck
Summary: Just some connected one-shots about Dante and Vergil's adventure in Realm of Demons and (maybe) the Human World.





	1. The Curious Case of Vergil

Chapter 01: The Curious Case of Vergil

“Hooaaaahhhh”

Dante woke up with a loud yawn, finding the sky above him getting darker. 

“It has day and night, neat” Dante mused, before he scratch and throw a few air boxing punches. A warm-up for his next fight with Vergil.

Despite being superpowered half-demons capable of subjugating the entire demonic population through might alone, Dante and Vergil were basically just that, half-demon. As such, they still possess the needs and wants of mortals.

That included the urge to lie down and take a short break every once in a while. They were far from the realm where Qliphoth was housed, for they had found themselves smashing the dimension apart a little too much. The two men opted to travel the interconnected and often confusing dimensions of Demonic World, fighting each other and other demons until they found a place to crash in and sleep. It took them a while, since the pit was anything but friendly, but they managed to find one such place.

Limbo, it was called. A dimension where the Demon World denizens were treated with view of human world without actually being able to go there. Due to the nature of the realm, no demon safe for few young or weak ones waste their life going there, educating themselves on their prey. Dante and Vergil had tried to open a portal through this realm but soon realized that not even Yamato could break the rules of this dimension.

Compared to the human world, Limbo was a barren and lifeless land, with grey and brittle plant-like structures. The weather was reminiscent of a desert, although it was not unbearable for the half-demons. In fact, it was one of the most comfortable environment.

“Now, to find Vergil” Dante cracked his neck and went to find his brother’s sleeping spot. Thankfully for him, being one half of a half-demonic twin meant he could sense where Vergil existed if they were near, so he just had to follow that. 

It was then when he began to hear it.

“Sleep, sleep, beauty bright,  
Dreaming in the joys of night;  
Sleep, sleep; in thy sleep  
Little sorrows sit and weep”

A voice, so damned familiar yet should be impossible brought Dante to a pause. Immediately, Dante jog to the presence of demonic power and the voice, where he found Vergil resting beneath a purple root, grey trunk and branches, crowned with red fruits and yellow leaves. Vergil must’ve chosen it for its beauty, but it was not the reason why Dante's eyes went wide.

Beside his resting brother was a man clad in dark green jacket and vest with yellow patterns, his hair as black as night and tattoos covered every inch of his body. The man recited the william Blake poem from a book in his hand. He read it so sincerely and with great emotion, that the man was crying throughout the reading. Upon further inspection, he had a green top hat near his person, an article of clothing Dante had never seen Vergil or this man wore in their life. To his left was a cane he’d last seen on top of the infernal tree.

Certainly, it was impossible, but here he was. The man with numbered days, the William Blake Priest, the mysterious one.

“V?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Man I messed up the tree's name. sorry about that


	2. The Curious Case of Vergil 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the continuation of the previous chapter

The man snapped his eyes open and found themselves in the presence of the half-demon. His lips turned upward in delight. 

“Dante…. It has been a while” 

the summoner magician, the ruthless and manipulating human, the incomplete one, greeted him. His body no longer had cracks all over and it was clearly full of vitality, absent the last time the devil hunter saw him. Dread began to fill Dante’s heart from the possibility of actually killing his twin brother again.

“How the hell are you here? Have you separated again?” If Vergil somehow became Urizen again, Dante had to dispatch him.

V shook his head a little. 

“It was not easy to undo what Yamato sever, like breaking glass and glueing them back together” the summoner answered as he threw his book into the air, disappearing in a dark aura.

Since the original book was supposed to be in the hands of his nephew, this one must be coming from Vergil’s memory, Dante must’ve guessed.

“So, my dear twin brother’s soul is still in pieces after the whole Yamato business, which results in you and the whole doppelganger thing” Dante walked closer to the tree, looking at his brother…. Or rather, looking for a sign that his brother was to become some 10-15 feet tall monster. 

V confirmed his statement by a slight nod.

“Damn, I can use that for a nice foursome”

The man snorted before laughing loudly, one that Dante likened to the sound of a baby crying. It was how hideous V laughed in his ear. Despite that, Dante allowed himself a small smile.

“Anyhoo, Is Urizen separated from Vergil too?” Urizen might be weaker compared to his current self, but that demonic side of his brother was anything if not resourceful in gaining power, even more so than Vergil himself. He couldn’t be too careful.

“Every Night & every Morn  
Some to Misery are Born.  
Every Morn & every Night  
Some are Born to sweet Delight”

V recited parts of a poem again, complete with the undercurrent of melancholy Dante had associated with the man. Dante wondered why he was patient enough to let Mr Poetry indulge himself before getting an answer. Maybe he was just that nice of a guy or maybe he just needed a poem after months in Demon World, the legendary devil hunter himself was not sure.

Maybe…. Just maybe, because this moment was the only time he would ever see his brother’s pure unadulterated humanity. 

“Safe and harmless” V finally answered as he reached for his hat and hold it upside down, a miniature Urizen was there, endlessly training himself and using the demonic skills he gained from his stint as a demon king. It was almost adorable how his skills failed to do anything to damage the hat, almost. V blow the hat and Urizen disappeared in a green-blue haze. Presumably back to Vergil’s soul.

“Harmless? Yeah right” Dante sarcastically responded, “My brother, the one I know, summoned the thick shaft of hell and ram it to earth’s ass, but he wouldn’t turn humanity into some hell plant fertilizer”

“He has chosen the path of wisdom, now that he has all the power in the world” V twirled his finger onto his cane and put the hat on. Dante noted the passing resemblance to Willy Wonka if Willy was poor and his chocolates were actually meth.

Man, he and Vergil used to love that movie when they were kids. Mother and father liked it too. Was that the reason V used this form? Was his humanity this underdeveloped that he clung onto fragments of his childhood to manifest his form?

“If I never separate man from devil…. Maybe it would happen anyway.... Far in distant future” V mused as he poked his original self’s cheek with his cane, causing the man to flail his hand slightly. Dante mused that Vergil must’ve hidden mischievous side if one judged by the existence V and his familiar.

There was also a case where he spied on V tap-dancing with his demonic familiars as his audiences.

Well…. Replace that with Vergil and it just… look…. wrong…..

 

“Anyway…. So Nero is my son?” V rhetorically asked, changing the topic “I thought he was yours. He behaves as improperly as you”

“Well, I’m the uncle” Dante shrugged, still felt weird to talk to this man who had a different face and voice than his brother but also happened to be his humanity. Also, goddamn he had to talk about (what is most likely) byproduct of his escapades. In this, he preferred the stoic and quiet Vergil more than V.

“A poor example of one,” said V, in a matter-of-fact tone, but his eyes twinkled so slightly with humour.

“Not as poor as the father” Dante snarked back and V raised one of his eyebrows.

“Touche, but…..” V was about to counter when a beautiful sight made him stand up from his and looked at the endless horizon.

“Dante… Look…" V point at the sky with his cane as he placed the hat on his head. Dante followed his line of sight and found what ruffled his feathers.

It was Nero, Kyrie, and Nico, travelling in that goddamn indestructible van. Nico was behind the wheel driving safely for once, must be because Kyrie was there (Dante had witnessed first hand how scary Kyrie could be when she’s angry). She was dressed a little conservatively this time, wearing an oversized shirt with blue square pattern, chewing on gums instead of smoking. 

Kyrie, for the first time in Dante’s life, wearing something other than a dress. She styled her hair in a ponytail, revealing much of her luscious white neck and wore blue jean jackets, grey blouse, and blue pants that showed just how lucky Nero was for having her love. Dante had experienced first-hand how well Kyrie could cook. She made him one amazing homemade Pizza. Speaking of cooking, she was cooking what appears to be a steak on top of one of Nico’s metals (which might be demonic in nature, considering it looks just like Gilgamesh) and Punch Line as makeshift replacement for a stove.

The object of V’s attention, Nero, was for once didn’t look like a punk itching for a fight. He was wearing a grey sweater, a white shirt, and a navy blue pants, with the sleeves rolled up above his elbow. He sat on the couch, Red Queen and Blue Rose were on his side, looking polished and shiny. On his left hand was the William Blake poem anthology Vergil treasured. His brows furrowed as he was visibly concentrating on understanding the poems.

It was beautiful. The sight. It was unknown where they were going or the context of the whole situation. Hell, Dante and V couldn't even hear anything going on over there. But damn.... damn if it was not the most beautiful thing they had ever seen after their mother's face.

No words were exchanged, V and Dante just basked there, at the sight of their unplanned, but very much welcome addition to their family lineage.

When the image changed, Dante was about to ask something to V, but the man was no longer there. Instead, he found his brother standing beside him, as emotionless as a stone.

“Good evening, little brother”

“Evenin' Verge” Dante answered, unsure of what to say.

The next thing he knew, he was blocking Yamato’s strike with his namesake sword. 

“Let's do some warm-up” said Vergil as spin his sword, holding it in reverse grip, before he disappeared from Dante’s sight in a flash of blue, only to reappear behind him. Dante's sword disappeared as the metallic greaves and gloves covered his limbs and he spin kick his brother without even looking back. Dante grinned, he was in familiar territory.

"I need a new devil arm" Vergil commented, wiping the blood from his cut lips.

"Maybe we need to find Beowulf, shiny bastard escaped my colleague's armoury five years ago," said Dante while he summoned Cerberus King, transforming it into the fiery Bo Staff.

"A good idea" Vergil said as he summoned his spectral blades, forming what appeared to be a halo behind him, before it launched in the speed of thought.

Dante planted the Bo firmly on the ground, causing it to crack violently under pressure and heat, and he used it as a pole, dodging and kicking away the blades. The Bo changed into Sansetsukon just as Vergil had closed in on his twin brother. 

It was a feint, for Cerberus King and Dante disappeared from view in a speed that Vergil wouldn't associate with anyone but himself. Then again, his brother had proven himself to be the jack of all-trades, so he shouldn't be so surprised.

When Dante reappear from his short trickster-style teleportation wielding the Sword of Dante in normal Devil Trigger, red spectral blades following behind him, the Dark Slayer was ready for him in the same state, swords already in place.

The explosion of demonic energy rocked the realm and their visitors ran in the opposite direction, for even if they weren't so familiar with the energy, one thing was obvious.

They were Gods.

In the end, Limbo was smashed apart by the two brothers and both had to find a new place to crash in, figuratively and literally.

Dante wondered if Vergil was aware of his talk with V, or if he saw that glorious sight on the horizon, but the destruction of Limbo prompted Dante and Vergil both to scourge the rest of the demon world, looking for a tear in the dimension leading to Human World.

They found heaven instead, but that was another story, and I am about to run out of demon blood supply to write this, Sorry about that.

Until Later

Titivillus  
-Scribe of Sparda-

PS: Beowulf is one unlucky bastard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Man I am really sloppy in grammar and detail, need to work it out


End file.
